The Turning Point of Change: Pain Pushes, Vision Pulls

There comes a point in every journey where pain can no longer be the only motivator.

At first, it is pain that drives us. The discomfort becomes intolerable. The grief, the numbness, the stuckness—we just want out. So we push. We leave the job. We end the relationship. We say no. We say yes. We scramble for the edge of whatever trap we’re in, not always knowing what we’re running toward, only what we’re running from.

This phase—pushed by pain—is vital. It’s the friction that wakes us up.

But if we stay here too long, constantly bracing against life, we burn out. We begin to see that running from pain isn’t the same as moving toward purpose. That reacting is not the same as choosing. That pain is not the only teacher—we must eventually choose vision as our guide.

This is the turning point.

It’s the moment we stop asking “What hurts?” and begin asking “What’s possible?”

It’s when we begin to sense, however faintly, a vision—not necessarily fully formed, but compelling. A tug toward something we want rather than something we merely need to escape. And slowly, we’re no longer just trying to avoid the past. We’re now drawn forward into our becoming.

Pain says, “Get away.”
Vision says, “Come here.”

Both can move us. But only one can sustain us.

When vision begins to pull, we find energy where there was exhaustion. We begin to align choices with what matters. Life stops feeling like damage control and starts becoming direction.

And the most beautiful part?

It’s okay if you’re not there yet.
It’s okay if pain is still what’s pushing.
You’re not doing it wrong.

Just listen closely.
One day, you might notice the pain is quieter…
Because your vision is speaking louder.