From “I Gotta” to “I Choose”
Every day, we move through a landscape of demands – deadlines, obligations, expectations. We tell ourselves “I gotta get this done,” and before we know it, our lives feel like one long to-do list. But what if we paused and asked, “Do I really want to do this?” Shifting from “I gotta” to “I choose” isn’t just a word swap – it’s a reclamation of agency, a return to what truly lights us up.
The Weight of “I Gotta”
When we frame our tasks as nonnegotiable “gottas,” several things happen:
Obligation fatigue sets in. Our nervous system interprets must-do’s as stressors, draining our energy over time.
Disconnect from purpose. We lose sight of why we’re doing what we’re doing, which chips away at intrinsic motivation.
Erosion of agency. Believing we have no choice fosters a sense of “stuckness” – a feeling that life is happening to us, rather than by our own volition.
“I gotta do the dishes.” Versus “I choose to care for my home.”
Notice how the second statement reconnects you to intention and ownership.
The Promise of “I Choose”
Shifting into “I choose” rewires the way we approach every action:
Mindful alignment. We pause to ask, “Why is this important? How does it serve me?”
Energized engagement. Choices – even small ones – ignite a spark of autonomy that propels us forward.
Resilience under pressure. Obstacles become opportunities to reaffirm our commitment: “I choose this because…”
This isn’t about ignoring responsibilities. It’s about reframing them as expressions of your values.
Five Practices to Cultivate “I Choose”
Name the “Gotta.”
Before diving in, jot down: “I gotta _________.”
Notice any emotional or physical tension that arises.
Uncover the “Why.”
Ask: “What outcome do I actually want?”
Translate “I gotta finish this report” into “I choose to craft a clear proposal so my team can move forward.”
Infuse Intention.
Begin each session with a two-sentence affirmation: “I choose to devote my focus to X because it supports Y.”
Speak it aloud or write it at the top of your page.
Micro-choices throughout the day.
Whenever “I gotta” pops up, pause and swap in “I choose.”
Notice how the energy of the task shifts.
Celebrate the Choice.
At the end of the day, reflect: “Where did I feel most empowered by choosing?”
Acknowledge those wins, however small.
Reflection Prompts & Mini-Exercises
Journaling Prompt:
List three tasks you “gotta” do this week.
For each, write beside it: “I choose to… because…”
How does each statement feel different when framed as a choice?
Embodiment Practice:
Stand with feet hip-width apart.
Inhale deeply and say to yourself, “I choose…”
Exhale, releasing any tightness in shoulders or jaw.
Visualize your chosen action as a pathway opening before you.
Language Check-In: Set a timer to go off three times today. When it rings, scan your internal dialogue for any “gottas” and reframe them into “chooses.”
Step into Your Power
Every “I choose” is an invitation to live with more presence, purpose, and passion. While we can’t eliminate every “gotta” from life, we can transform them into conscious decisions that align with who we are and where we’re headed.
Let this shift be your daily practice: from the habitual pull of obligation into the liberating push of authentic desire. Because when you move from “I gotta” to “I choose,” you aren’t just checking boxes – you’re authoring your own story.
“Today, I choose to….” Fill in the blank, and watch how your world unfolds in response.
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